United Greenskin Postal Service

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"So do you work for the post office or what?" This is probably the most common question I get when I bring out the UGPS.

I figure it is time to at least record the story. I started playing warhammer just as 6th edition came out, though I did not realize it at the time. I bought the box set, and then started thinking about an army. At the time I only knew one friend who played, and he already played Orcs & Goblins, so I avoided them even though I liked what I saw of them. The Vampire Counts book had just came out with new stuff, so I picked that instead. Besides, was feeling a bit intimidated about this whole hobby, and knew I could paint a decent skeleton!

I played it for about a year, getting my butt kicked. In that time I found that it didn't matter if someone else played the same army, no two armies are ever alike, so I decided to do Orcs & Goblins. However I wanted to do a theme. I also like the random nature of the army, and wanted to put as much of that into the list as I could. The two ideas I had were a circus (and I have since seen an Excellent Circus goblin army, so I'm glad I didn't pick that) and the concept of going postal. I simply had more ideas for postal units than circus.

The first version of this was the United Goblin Postal Service - and I had no orcs in it. I actually took this to the Columbus GT and had fun with it. However with the 7th edition of Warhammer Fantasy Battles coming out, I looked at my army, and especially with the new Orc & Goblin Army Book - realized they were completely nerfed. Just did not seem competitive any more. So after some long seconds of deep soul searching, I thought to myself, "Self, I can rebuild this army. I have the technology. I can make it stronger, more competitive, sillier than it was before."

8th edition is now out, as is the new O&G book. However I'm going to let these guys rest for a while - I've got a new, different, O&G army in the works!

Army
Army & Display Base

The display base is made up to be a post office, overrun by the greenskins. They changed the sign and raised their own flag. Added artillery to the roof, and the characters will also stand up there to survey the troops. It is a fairly large and cumbersome display, especially because of the side panels which are painted to resemble a mailbox from the side. You can see the older version with the green flock, as opposed to the sand & static grass on the bases of the newer version.

Awards

I must have done something right, because In addition I won best appearance at Origins 2007, and then at GenCon 2007 they went and won the whole thing. I was a bit surprised, as my goal, as always, was simply to get a few chuckles and have people appreciate my army.

Awards

Actually, I must have done something very right. At the Marauders Mayhem held in Dayton on October 13-14, 2007, I took the Generals Choice award, as well as 2nd place for Sportsmanship. These made me really feel good, as both are based on the votes of the other players (in fact my sportsmanship score was tied for the top, with the tiebreaker being game play, and I got whupped pretty good in most of my games). Pics of the event are here.

Characters
Black-Orc Warlord

The general has always been represented on a giant mailbox. This has been changed a couple of times, with the original general being a goblin great shaman

Goblin Warlord

A goblin general is also on a mailbox, but not nearly as big as the orc one. I a;ctually had named all the characters in the list from 'famous' postmen. Postmaster General Potter (postmaster at the time), Clavin (Cliff Clavin from cheers), Beasley (Mr. Beasley from the Blondi comic strip), Franklin (Benjamin Franklin, the first postmaster), Nicholson (Jack Nicholson, from The Postman Always Rings Twice) and Costner (Kevin Costner from The Postman)

Also back then, if you only had goblin characters you got an extra big boss for every 1000 pts - so I had 6 characters. Needless to say I have a lot of goblin characters

Orc Big Boss Battle Standard Bearer

The BSB is carrying a big banner, of course.

Goblin Big Boss Battle Standard Bearer

Back in 6th, Rowdy Grot's Red Raggedy Banner gave +1 leadership to the unit, so this with the general suddenly made some goblins that didn't always run away

Goblin Big Boss - Extra

These are the 'extra' big bosses you got in 6th edition - both of them are riding in a chariot with a great weapon. I haven't used them since 7th came out, however in 8th you can take units of goblin chariots - so if hte army comes out of retirement then I'll have these ready (without the characters).

Night Goblin Shamans

Older shamans

Goblin Shaman

These two were rebased into the new version of the army, with the bases fitting the theme (first a mailbox)

Night Goblin Shaman

and then a package

Core Units
Goblins - eMail

A unit of common goblins - all with "e's" on their shield - the email unit (ok, kind of weak, but it gets hard to keep coming up with new unit connections). The banner is intended to indicate "NO SPAM". They did not get rebased

One of the most interesting parts was using the regiment bases to have some fun and model them fighting due to animosity. (The goblin getting the spear in the 'nads' is actually glued to the spear not the base, being lifted off his feet from the force of the spear) Of course this made this unit an animosity magnet.

Night Goblins - Philatelists

Night goblins with hand weapons & shields that collect stamps - the Philatelists. Each unit of Night Goblins was a different color, and had a set of fanatics to match. These guys got rebased for the new version

Night Goblins - OverNight Goblins

This unit of Night Goblins with bows were the "over"night goblins - themed after Fedex. They did not make the new version of the army.

Night Goblins - Snail Mail

The old fashioned, slow, post office - or snail mail. I am actually re-using this idea in the new army, as I couldn't think of any other water idea for night goblins (not snail mail, but the shells for shields and spears).

The rebased version, and the rebased fanatics.

Night Goblins - UPS Boyz

Another unit of night goblins with spears - all in brown. I liked the idea of using the UPS Shield logo as shields. They did not survive the cut - however they were replaced with a unit of Orcs going forward

Orc Boyz - UPS Boyz

So either the goblins grew or were eaten, but the UPS Boyz are now Orc Big-Uns. Unfortunately these have two hand weapons, so no more UPS shields. But each one is in shorts and you can see their knees. What can Brown do to you today?

Goblin Wolf Riders - Pony Express

The Gobbo express was converted to hold pouches of letters - though these were, appropriately for goblins, always falling out.

Half of them were rebased for the new version

Forest Goblin Spider Riders - Web Mail

The other half of the wolf riders became spider riders, and the appriopriate web mail with the new spiders from the 7th edition

Snotlings - Mail sorters

I based but never converted the snotlings - I actually have 10 bases of them. They were going to be the mail sorters.

Special Units
Black Orcs - Mailboxes

What better way to represent big armored troops than mailboxes - and thus the black ocs.

Squigs / Squig Hoppers - Dog Pound

Originally I had a unit of squigs with hoppers in them. Then in 7th the hoppers became a separate unit, so I kept them but didnt' rebase the squigs. These were intended to be the dogs that ate your mail (or mailman).

Spear Chukkas - air mail

I had four spear chuckas that each had mail attached to them sending to the troops. I like the little diaramas on the bases, especially for where I have the one yelling at the other to get to work. Most of the crews are 40K grots. These all were rebased

Rock Lobba - special delivery

How better to deliver a package than to throw it as high and hard as you can? I haven't used it in a long time, though in 8th it is now rare and much better.

Rare Units
Giant

Originally I had two giants - based on the Giants of Albion models with river troll heads. One holds a club, the other a GW Mail order package. (this was made by reducing a real box via xerox several times)

Giant

Then the new, plastic giant kit came out, and I had to have one. This one was swinging a mailbox, with a snotling holding on for dear life.

Snotling Pump Wagon - Mail Truck

I convered a pump wagon, but haven't used it much. The newer rules make it better however.

Doom Diver - Fedex Delivery

Covered the wings with Fedex envelopes and let him fly

This site was last updated July 11, 2011